Friday, May 25, 2007

Driving turns you into an asshole

It's true. Driving a car turns you and me and anyone else who does it into an asshole. There's nothing you can do about it. The traffic flow system we have created rewards a certain level of asshole behavior and enables a much higher one.

Even with the best of intentions, try to get through a full day of driving without doing at least one thing even you yourself have to agree was assholical. I know I couldn't do it, and I bet you couldn't either.

The game is rigged. We seal ourselves in glass and metal cans and try to get from place to place as fast as we feel conditions will allow. We deal not only with physical limitations in this quest, but with the imposed limits of legality, some scraps of courtesy, and simple self-preservation. With all that loaded on us, we try to flow as smoothly as schooling fish or a big flock of birds, but they're all generally going to the same place. We're scampering all over the place.

Good luck and be safe out there today, Asshole.

1 comment:

Leslie said...

Ah ha ha ha. I used to drive like an asshole. I used the middle finger liberally, as well, until one day, after flipping off an old man in a beat up truck, he tried to run me off the road.

From that point on, I began rehabilitating myself. Now I drive like my grandma. My blood pressure thanks me. :)